Breathe For Me
by disnickyX
Summary: AU Jori. Jade's a teacher at HA and Tori's one of her students. I know Tori's more sweet and nourishing, so it'd be more acceptable if she was the teacher. I guess I just wanna see if I can pull this off without making Jade into some kind of perverted predator, but I don't want to compromise her character and make her too OOC either. I want it to be wrong, but right, you know?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **Of course I don't own Victorious. I'm not smart enough to come up with this kind of geniusness;)

**Author's note: **Just as a warning, the rating for this story _will_ change. If that makes you uncomfortable, please don't invest any time into reading this story.

{~~~JADE~~~}

I sit outside the building, doing nothing. Just sitting in my car and thinking, _persuading_ myself to keep sitting in my car. To _not_ enter the building.

It's early in the morning. 6:30am in fact. But that doesn't matter. The building is open 24/7.

I stare at the flashing "open" sign. So big. So enticing. So inviting.

But I don't go in. I can't.

I yawn. A reminder that I haven't had my coffee, yet I'm somewhat functional. Alert even. It's because I'm thinking so hard. _Concentrating. _I'm persuading myself to sit right here.

Who knew it could be so difficult to sit still? Who knew it could be so difficult to stay here in my car; to not open my door; to not walk into the building? Who knew that could be difficult?

But it is.

It's very difficult.

Very hard.

I take a deep breath. I exhale. Then I take another breath, cleanse my mind.

Then I drive off.

I go to work. I leave the building behind, and I go to work.

Every day I do this. Sometimes twice a day. I park outside of the building, I sit in my car, and I restrain myself from getting out, from going inside.

Why do it at all? Why drive to the building in the first place?

Because there's something in there I want; but when I get the urge to go to the building it feels more like there's something in there that I _need. _

And so I sit there. In the parking lot. And I breathe until I can convince myself that the thing in the building, the thing I need, want, so bad, would be bad for me to have. Wrong.

It would be wrong.

Not the thing itself. But the purpose for which I would buy it. That would be wrong.

Wrong.

Because I want to sleep with one of my students. One of my_ female _students.

I'm not a pervert or a pedophile. I swear I'm not. And I won't let anyone judge me, not until they take a walk in my shoes. And my shoes take me to Hollywood Arts every morning, Monday through Friday except holidays.

I teach scriptwriting. Not the average course for a high school, but Hollywood Arts is not a regular high school. It's a performing arts school, one of the best in fact. What we, as educators, do there, is mold future movie stars and artists. Which also means, there are more attractive kids there than there aren't. Like maybe eighty nine percent would first and foremost be described as sexy. The other eleven percent are so talented that their looks don't even matter. In fact, their unattractive faces have become quite endearing, in a way.

So of course I like to look, but what makes it so that I'm not a pedophile? I don't find myself attracted to any of these kids. They've got the look, sure, but they know it. They know they're talented. They know they're attractive. They know they're gonna_ be _somebody.

Especially the scholarship kids. You'd think they'd be the most humble, not having money like the rest of their school mates. And you'd be wrong. They're the worst of them all because scholarship kids are the special ones. The ones with raw talent. The ones who were scouted during school plays at _normal_ junior high and middle schools. Elementary schools too, in rare cases. So those kids, the scholarship kids, tend to be the most popular, the most cocky, and also the most hated, because they book more jobs.

Let me tell you, that much arrogance is a complete turn off, but it's what I expect from my students as well. These kids _have _to have a certain amount of self-importance, otherwise what the hell are they doing here?

I get through my day quite easily despite my morning…hiccup though. I always do. I'm an excellent actress. Far better than my students. I just happen to value my privacy more than the fame.

I warn my students about that part of stardom. But they claim it's worth it.

Half of the ones who make it will go insane from the lack of privacy. From the inability to simply go out and get a cheeseburger because fans and paparazzi want to-

"Ms. West, are you listening to me?"

I blink twice and look at the student who's interrupted my internal musings. Tori Vega. She's the _only_ kid who calls me that.

It's West. Just West. That's what every other student in this_ entire_ school calls me. Except for this one. God, this girl works my nerves like no other.

She's a scholarship kid, which means she should be arrogant and conceited as hell. And why not? She's got the look. Big brown doe eyes, slim in figure, long, wavy brown hair, and something that no other girl in this school has. The most prominent cheekbones I've ever set eyes on.

She's also got talent. Singing and dancing is what she's most comfortable with, but her acting's actually pretty damn phenomenal. That's only in class though. She tends to get a bit of stage fright when it's time to perform in front of an audience. Sikowitz is working on that now. He's a brilliant teacher, weird, but brilliant. The girl will be a triple threat by the time she graduates…which is in two years, because Tori Vega is finishing her sophomore year. She's a little late though. I'm not too clear on the details, but I know she was held back in kindergarten. Who the hell gets held back in kindergarten? Add that to her late birthday and she's the oldest sophomore Hollywood Arts has ever had.

I sigh deeply. Tori's class is my last class of the day. So that bell that _just_ rang was the final bell. The one that means it's time to go home. Yet, instead of going home and getting a head start on her weekend like all of the normal kids in this school, this girl has decided to corner me instead.

I grit my teeth and smile at her. "I'm sorry, what were you saying?"

She huffs impatiently, her chest heaving slightly, and it takes a lot of effort on my part to keep my eyes on her face. I don't know why. She's barely an A-cup.

"A dance." She all but whines.

That's another thing about Tori. She irritates me. Bad. Something about her just makes me cringe, so I don't know exactly why she, of all the students in this freakin school, is the one my libido likes to get active around. Oh, did I mention Tori's the student I want to sleep with? No? Well she is and it confuses me to no end.

I know it's not just her physical appearance. As I've said, there are plenty of good looking students here. And it can't be her personality because she irritates me. So there's probably something wrong with me.

I'm hoping it passes soon.

"What about a dance?" I sigh, eventually.

"It's almost the end of the year and we haven't had a school dance yet." She continues.

_Because they're stupid, pointless, and useless,_ I think to myself before giving her what I hope is an encouraging smile.

She doesn't say anything else after that and I figure she's waiting on me.

"Is there a question in there somewhere?" I ask, dropping my smile. I can only do that for so long.

She gives me a brilliant smile, and before I can start thinking about how bright and sunshiny it is, I arrange my face into a scowl.

"I was wondering if we can have one!" She exclaims. "Maybe a spring formal, or oh, what about a Sadie Hawkins dance?"

"A what?" I scowl some more, hoping she'll get discouraged and walk away.

No such luck.

"You know, a Sadie Hawkins dance! The one where instead of the guys asking the girls it's the other way around!" She finishes excitedly, and I have a feeling that's the one she wants to go with now.

"Why are you asking me?" I ask, my scowl still in place as I pack up my briefcase. Home. It's time to go home. Doesn't this kid wanna go home?

"You're…you're the head of student activities." She blinks at me.

She's right. I_ am_ the head of student activities, and as such I've got enough on my plate as it is. Trying to balance the school plays, trips, fundraisers, etc…let's just say, I've got enough to do without worrying about a stupid dance. Hollywood Arts has gone decades without doing the silly things, why start now?

"Ms. West?"

"No." I brush by her.

"What?" She gasps behind me.

"No." I repeat firmly.

I hear her scrambling up behind me and I successfully resist the urge to turn around and scream at her.

"Why not?" I hear her pant behind me. "Give me a reason and 'because I said so' is not one."

"Because I said so." I answer without missing a beat.

She grabs my arm.

Big mistake.

I whirl around and snatch away from her so forcefully that she falls, landing on her knees in front of me.

"Never touch me!" I hiss down at her.

Her face goes crimson, her eyes get wet. Please God don't let her cry. I didn't mean to make her fall, but I don't take it back.

It's my rule. Has been ever since my first year teaching here. Some senior with the hots for me told his whole class I gave him a deep massage, clothes off and everything, when in all actuality, I just gave him a pat on the shoulder for a job well done. After that, it's been my own personal rule. I don't touch my students, and they don't touch me. That way no one can accuse me of inappropriate touches between me and my students if there's no touching at all.

My students are used to it by now, but this is Tori's first year. Granted, this is a lot of my students' first years, but Tori….I don't know. The girl is made for touching. I don't think she realizes how much she does it, but I've watched her with her friends. She's extremely hands on. If she's not touching some part of one of her friends, she's unconsciously maneuvering herself so that one of her friends is touching her. So I know she didn't mean anything by grabbing me a few seconds ago, but like I said. It's my rule.

Tori stands up. She looks okay, physically. I don't see any bruising on her knees, but she's concentrating really hard on wiping them off. She's too embarrassed to look me in the face.

"I'll see you Monday, Tori." I tell her before walking away. I also thank God it's Friday. I won't have to see the girl for two whole days, and maybe by then this little incident will be forgotten.

I couldn't have been more wrong.

It's Saturday now, a good day I guess. It's beautiful out and all, but it's also late afternoon and I'm out for a jog. Which means, the sun's high, bright, and beaming down on me like there'll be no tomorrow.

So, I'm cursing myself out, as I always do during my Saturday afternoon jogs. For the millionth time, I'm wondering why I just can't wake up early and go while the sun's still sleeping.

I promise to wake up tomorrow morning and go, but I know I won't. I never keep those promises because I'm not much of a morning person. It's bad enough I've got to wake up early during the week to go to work.

"Ms. West!" I hear behind me.

Great. The sun's kicking my ass so bad that I'm hallucinating now.

"Ms. West!" I hear again, and I keep moving. There's just no way…

Suddenly she's jogging beside me. Tori Vega. I knew it was her. Like I said, she's the only person who calls me that. But, I don't know, I guess I was still hoping I was imagining her voice. And now that I know I haven't been, I turn and glare at her.

"How'd you find me?" I snap.

"Why can't we have a dance? I want a real reason." She pants beside me.

"Are you stalking me or something?"

She jogs a little ahead of me and turns so that she's jogging backwards, facing me, forcing me to look at her. "I want to have a Sadie Hawkins dance." She answers firmly.

The look on her face, that determined grimace thing that she's doing, sends a shot of pure wanting into my lower stomach.

I look down and I breathe. I inhale sharply, trying to cleanse my mind.

Wrong.

That feeling was wrong.

I'm barely watching where I'm going, trying so hard to avoid what her gaze is doing to me, but now I'm looking at her legs. She's got great legs. Long, smooth, blemish free. They're perfect. And there's another shot, sent straight down to core as I find myself imagining those perfect long legs wrapped around me.

I blink a few times, and my eyes roam upward, thighs, tight shorts, flat stomach, sports bra. Jeez-the-fuck-us! The girl's leaving very little to my imagination. I swear Tori's the only human who is more perfect in real life than whatever I've fantasized about her.

Finally, I look back up at Tori's face, because really, looking at her body isn't doing me any favors.

"No." I snap at her, shaking my head vehemently.

I interrupt whatever the hell she was talking about. I shout "no" at her, but really, I'm talking to myself.

"Please, Ms. West." She pouts, staring me straight in my eyes. "I'll do anything."

It's that little whimper that causes my brain to go haywire. I literally have to put all my effort into _not _imagining her beneath me, panting, whimpering, begging for me to….ah shit.

I start to run. Like, _run. _I seriously need to get away from her.

She chases after me for a few minutes, but she gets tired soon. Normally, I'm not much of a long distance sprinter, but I've got enough adrenaline pumping through my brains to keep at this pace for hours.

"I'll see you later, Ms. West!" She yells after me.

Fuck!

{~~~O~~~}

Sunday I stayed home the whole day. Never mind my fridge is empty and all I have to eat is peanut butter and jelly. But I couldn't risk Tori making good on her promise to "see me later."

Which was stupid on my part. It's not like I can avoid the girl forever. She _is_ my student.

"Jade?"

I look up from my lunch. Peanut butter and Jelly because I still haven't had time to go to the grocery store.

I tense up when I see who's standing in my classroom doorway. Principal Lane. When I was a student here, he was the guidance counselor. Now, he's a principal with _feelings_, always wanting to resolve issues in a healthy way and such.

"What?" I growl.

He doesn't come in; which means what he's got to say will be quick and final. I tense up even more.

"Give the girl a dance." He says, and then he leaves.

I throw the rest of my sandwich in the garbage. No longer hungry. Why should I have to suffer because Tori Vega wants a freakin' dance?

Why?

But I'm a good actress. I act like I'm okay. Like I'm not pissed the hell off.

My students are none the wiser.

_Tori Vega_ is none the wiser.

She sits in my classroom, the last period of the day, with a smile aimed at me. I try my best not to glare at her as I'm a professional, but I think I slip up a couple of times. I don't think she notices. She keeps smiling at me; but then again, she could be smiling because she knows she got her way.

The thought irritates me on a whole new level. I'm surprised there isn't smoke coming out of my ears by the end of the class.

_Five more minutes, Jade. Just five more minutes._

All of my students are packing up, getting ready to leave. There are five more minutes left, but they like to get ready early. Well, Tori isn't packing up, and I get this sneaking feeling that she's gonna try and corner me again, like she did Friday.

I don't know what for. She got what she wanted. There'll be a stupid dance.

Then a thought occurs to me. What if she wants to go over plans for the dance? Like decorating plans and stuff.

She does, I know it. And I have no time to waste on that kind of stuff. She wanted this dance so bad, she can figure it out on her own.

I pack up my briefcase and I'm out of class just seconds before the last bell rings. Teachers don't do that. I know, but I don't care.

I disappear into the most useless contraption in this school. The elevator. There are only two floors here at Hollywood Arts, and we don't have a single student in a wheelchair right now. But this is the only way to avoid the swarm of students emptying their classrooms.

Then one student slides in just as the elevator door closes.

Tori.

Dammit!

"Ms. West?" She pants, making it completely obvious that she ran after me.

"What?" I snap back, professionalism be damned. "Why are you following me now? Principal Lane visited me this afternoon. You have permission to do the stupid dance!"

"He did?" She frowns. "How'd he know I wanted a dance?"

I gape at her. It wasn't her who told him? Then who the hell did?

Suddenly the elevator stops and I snap my mouth shut before turning my body toward the door, away from my student.

"If you really don't want to do the dance…" she trails off behind me.

I ignore her in favor of waiting for the door to open. But it doesn't. I mash a few buttons, but nothing. The door still stays closed.

Seriously? There are only two freakin floors and this stupid elevator can't handle 'em?

"It's really not that big of a deal." Tori continues behind me.

I continue to ignore her, mashing the buttons a few more times before calling it quits.

"What's going on?" She asks, finally noticing the elevator doors haven't opened.

"Elevator's broken." I answer while pulling my phone out and dialing Lane's number.

There's a sharp gasp from Tori. Then she mutters, "I can't be in here anymore."

"Too bad." I shrug.

She pushes passed me and starts mashing the buttons frantically. I'd tell her I already tried that but I get the feeling she won't hear me. She looks panicked. More than panicked, actually. She looks like she's having some kind of….shit, she's claustrophobic!

"Lane!" I bark into my phone the _second_ he answers my call. "The elevator's broken!"

"No need to yell, Jade. I'll get someone on it soon." He answers calmly, almost soothingly.

Damn guidance counselors.

"No! I need someone on it now! There's another student in here with me!" I yell urgently.

"Jade…"

"She's claustrophobic!" I hiss, explaining the gravity of the situation.

At that moment, Tori sits down and squeezes her eyes shut. My eyes are drawn to her chest, the way it's heaving up and down so violently freaks me out a bit.

"Lane, you gotta get this kid outta here." I panic.

"Jade, listen to me. You have to calm her down."

"How the hell am I supposed to do that?"

"Find a way, Jade."

I look over at Tori. She still has her eyes screwed shut, and she's still doing that heavy breathing thing. "Tori, calm down!" I snap at her.

"A little more reassuringly, Jade."

"Why don't you do it?" I yell back at him.

"Because I'm not there, you are." He answers calmly.

Ugh!

I take a deep breath. "It's okay, Tori. Just, I don't know…think wide open spaces or something." I say.

"Shut up!" she hisses back at me.

My jaw drops for a second, but only for a second. "Lane, come get this kid now before I kill her!" I hiss into my phone.

"Jade, calm down. You're the adult. Go to her. Comfort her. You can _do_ this." He cheers me on.

But I_ can't_ do this.

"I don't touch my students!"

"Jade, there's an exception to every rule."

I hang up on him.

There's an exception to every rule my ass. Well, I acknowledge that there really _is_ an exception to every rule, but I'll be damned if Tori Vega is that exception. I already have an unprofessional attraction to her, and now I'm supposed to do what? Rub her back and whisper comforting encouragement into her ear.

I think I'll pass.

I sit down as far away from my student I can manage in this tiny space. I can't do what Lane wants me to do. I've got a strong will, but it's not Iron.

Truth is, I know I could have Tori if I wanted. She wouldn't be very hard to seduce. She craves attention, especially from me for some reason. I've noticed that.

If I was to finally give it to her, she'd be mine. Regardless of what she thinks her sexual orientation is. Most straight girls don't know they're gay until another girl gets in her pants.

I bet only three minutes have gone by so far, but it feels like so much longer. Mainly because of Tori's breathing. It's loud and unsettling. The way she's gasping for air is so hard to ignore.

Poor baby, but I can't go to her.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

It stops eventually, the loud breathing, but only to be replaced by something else. Something worse.

It's gotten quieter, her breathing. Much quieter, but I hear a bit of a wheeze now, and it's followed by these small hitches.

The hitches are consistent, coming every second…

My heart starts to pound. That's not normal.

They start coming every two seconds…

My hands itch to cover up my ears, but I make fists in my lap instead.

They start coming every five seconds…

I'm barely breathing, just listening to her. This is driving me insane.

Every seven seconds…

Jesus! It's getting worse.

Every sixteen seconds…

It's like…It's like I'm listening to her _die_.

Every one, two, three…I count twenty seconds.

My eyes fly open and I scramble over to her. She's lying down now, curled up on her side. Eyes shut, sweating, and shivering. What the hell? This has got to be more than just claustrophobia.

I hover over her, on my hands and knees. I still don't touch. I _can't _touch.

That would be bad.

Wrong.

"Tori." I whisper. "Breathe."

"Go… away." She wheezes with great difficulty. "You don't… care."

"Tori-" I try again, but she cuts me off.

"I'm…"

Wheeze.

"Fine…"

Hitch.

"Ms.…"

Wheeze.

"West."

I don't even think about it. I pull the top half of Tori into my lap, fitting the back of her neck into the crook of my elbow easily. She's so pale, her eyes vacant, unseeing. I swear she's stopped breathing. And I'm scared shitless.

"Breathe for me, baby." I demand, almost forcefully.

Her eyes change, focus. She's looking at me. Directly into my eyes. And then she takes a deep, rattling, breath and slowly exhales.

I breathe a small sigh of relief.

"Good girl." I croon. My free hand goes up to her face, taking hold of her chin. A silent demand for her to stay just like that, to keep looking at me.

She complies, giving me her undivided attention. She barely even blinks.

"Again." I command.

She does as I say. Taking a huge gulp of air, and there's no rattling in her chest this time. I nearly smile with pure relief.

I lower my hand. Rest it on her chest so I can _feel _her breathe.

"Again." I whisper.

It's the last time I have to say it. Because she starts breathing on her own. Huge deep breaths until she's gradually able to breathe regularly.

"Good." I encourage her. "Good job, baby." My mind's screaming at me to stop calling her that. Call her Tori, it corrects. Call her Vega. Hell, call her Ms. Tori, Ms. Vega, or even Ms. Tori Vega, but stop calling her baby because it's inappropriate. Because it's wrong.

Wrong.

"Good girl. Just keep breathing, baby." I murmur, ignoring my common sense. It doesn't matter anymore anyway. This won't be the last time I touch Tori Vega.

I know it won't.

{~~~O~~~}

I find myself sitting outside the building again.

I shouldn't go in.

I know it.

It's wrong.

That thing I need, the thing that's inside….it's wrong.

But I turn off my car.

_Turn it back on, Jade._

I unbuckle my seatbelt.

_Buckle yourself back in, Jade._

I open my door.

_Shut your door, Jade._

I step out.

_Get back in, Jade._

I stand.

_Sit down, Jade._

I shut my door.

_Open your door back up, Jade._

Lock my door.

_Wrong, Jade._

I walk.

_Stop, Jade._

And I walk into Toys X Us, the most popular adult store in all of L.A.

_Go back Jade. It's not too late._

But it is.

It's too late to go back.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: **I know I procrastinated on updating this one, but I just know you guys are gonna be mad at me for the ending. So I'm gonna apologize in advance. Sorry.

{~~~TORI~~~}

Ms. West is late.

I check my bedroom window again, just to be sure; but I wasn't mistaken. Her lights are still on. She's still home.

That's weird.

I'm an early riser, so I always wake up before my alarm goes off at 6:30. Miss West is usually gone by then, but not today.

I hope that doesn't mean I'll have a substitute. Not that I have anything against them personally. It's just that Ms. West is my favorite teacher.

I don't know why. She's extra hard on me. And not like the kind of hard where the teacher is trying to get her students to reach their maximum potential; but _hard _hard. It's almost like she doesn't like me as a person.

But the thought is just unfathomable to me. I don't think I'm anything special, but everybody likes me. Even people I _don't_ want to like me. But teachers _especially_ like me. In fact, I've been called a teacher's pet my whole life.

I don't think it's a bad thing.

I start getting ready for school. Shower, last minute checking of my homework, teeth brushing, the works.

I do my hair last, in a simple singular braid that I secure with a hair tie at the end.

I smile at my image in the mirror. Maybe not just my image, but at the braid itself. It's nothing special. Kinda sloppy even. But it was sloppy yesterday too when Ms. West did it.

It was when we were stuck in the elevator. It got really hot in there and I was starting to sweat; so Ms. West pulled my hair away from my face and put it in a quick braid because she didn't have an extra hair tie to put my hair up with.

I tug on a few strands on the side of my face to give it a bit more of the uniformed messy look.

"Perfect." I murmur before skipping my way down the stairs.

My dad's at the coffee maker already. He's an early riser, like me. Mom and Trina, on the other hand, they never wake up.

"Morning, Papi!" I sing, giving him a huge hug.

"Morning, M'hija." He grins brightly. He always gives me that smile. I'm kinda his favorite person, and I know it.

"Need a ride to school today?"

Every morning he asks me this as if I'll accept, and every morning I have to decline. I don't really like cars too much. Plus, it's not a long walk to school. Just ten minutes. I'll be fine.

"Need me to walk you?" He presses.

Like I'd ever say yes to that!

"Papi!" I groan. I mean, I get it. He's a police officer. Of course he's gonna be super overprotective, but sometimes he just goes overboard with it.

"Alright, alright. I had to try." He smiles at me. "You're just growing up too fast for me. It's not my fault if I can't keep up."

"Yeah, yeah," I roll my eyes, but playfully. I don't think I've ever been mad enough at him to roll them seriously.

He tosses me an apple.

I blow him a kiss, and then I practically skip my way to school.

I don't even know why I'm so happy today.

My apple's all gone by the time I get to Hollywood Arts. I've been carrying the core for about two minutes because I haven't come across a trash can yet.

Trina would probably tell me to just throw it on the ground because it's biodegradable, but Mami probably wouldn't want me to litter. So I don't.

Once I get to my locker, André meets me there a few seconds later. He's my best friend. I know Papi wishes it was Amber, or Riley, or Cat, or Josie, or Melissa, or some other _girl_. He's always saying, "M'hija, there's no such thing as a platonic friendship between a boy and a girl." But I don't think André would ever be interested in me. Not like that. He's always too busy treating me like I'm his baby sister. Plus I think he likes Riley…or Melissa. I can't tell which one. I don't think_ he _even knows which one he likes more. But when he figures it out, I'm sure he'll ask one of them out. And I'm sure she'll say yes.

"So…." He grins at me.

I smile back and wait for him to continue.

"Are we having a Sadie Hawkins Dance or not?"

It takes me all of three seconds to realize he's the one who told on Ms. West.

"André!" I exclaim.

"What? You deserve a dance. It's my job to make sure you always get what you deserve." He defends himself with an oh so serious look on his face.

I soften immediately. Seriously. Who can be mad at that?

"Thanks, Dré." I smile.

"Anytime." He winks, like he's off the hook. And he is, mostly, but I still want him to know what his little stunt cost me.

"You know she almost killed me yesterday?"

"Who?" he scowls, looking around for the girl who almost killed me yesterday, I guess. I shake my head. André's a mess. He's supposed to be a gentleman. Gentlemen don't hit ladies. But André…he's not a gentleman.

I grab his hand and start pulling him toward first period. "Ms. West, silly."

"Oh." He relaxes. "Don't worry, Tori. West can't kill you. She doesn't touch her students, remember?"

I touch my hair. A subconscious gesture I guess.

Ms. West touched_ me_ yesterday. Then before he realizes that I haven't responded, I smack him in the back of the head.

"Hey! What was that for?" He whines while rubbing his head.

He never hits me back.

"You don't have to touch someone to kill 'em, you dope. Ever heard of a gun before?"

He thinks about it for a second. What's to think about? Either he's heard of a gun or not. And we already know what the answer is.

"You should join track." Is his answer.

"Seriously, dude?"

"Yeah, dude."

I giggle.

"André here, Tori there." Our teacher sighs the minute he lays his eyes on us. He seems to think if we sit together we won't be able to concentrate in his class. So, he always separates us.

It's totally not true though. I'd hear every other word at _least_, and I'm smart enough to use my context clues to get the message.

"Good morning, Mr. Hart." I grin at my teacher.

He smiles back at me. "Good morning, Tori."

"Good morning, Mr. Hart." André mocks me.

"Don't make me start handing out detentions this early, Mr. Harris." Our teacher says sternly before getting on with the lesson.

Everybody laughs at André. Even me.

"Teacher's pet." He mouths to me.

I shrug my shoulders, never losing my grin. Like I said, I don't see anything wrong with being liked by my teachers. They _are_ in charge of my grades, and essentially my future, after all.

His class creeps by real slow though. Slower than usual. And so does the next one, and the one after that. I know it's because I can't for my last class, Ms. West's class. Even fourth period, Mr. Sikowitz's class, seems to take forever. And I usually think his class goes by _too _quick.

But finally the lunch bell rings. A signal that the day is almost over and that I'm _that_ much closer to seeing Ms. West again. I start to get a little nervous. What if she's still so…Ms. West-y. What if she doesn't like the way I've worn my hair. What if she doesn't like the reminder that she's broken her rule? That she touched me.

She doesn't ever touch us. And she doesn't ever let us touch her either, not even by accident. She's really adamant about that rule. I mean, she doesn't even touch her sisters. In fact, I didn't even _know_ Riley and Amber were her sisters, despite the fact that they look a _lot_ like her, until one of them told me. I don't exactly know which one it was. I couldn't tell them apart back then; but if I had to guess, I'd say it was Amber.

I touch my hair again. Yeah, Ms. West probably wouldn't like the reminder.

I start to undo the hair tie at the end when André grabs my arm, making me forget about it.

"Let's go, chica. I'm hungry."

"I'm coming." I giggle after him.

"That's what she said." Riley says behind me.

Everybody laughs, but I don't too much get it, so I ignore her.

"Wait! Don't forget to sign up for the extra credit script and improv merger! Last chance!" Mr. Sikowitz yells. Everyone pretends they don't hear him except me. I double back, towing André with me so we can sign the sheet. I'm not too sure what a script and improv merger is, but whatever. It's extra credit.

We make a quick stop at the grub truck, and then it's off to The Asphalt for lunch. I didn't realize how hungry I was until I had my burrito sitting in front of me. Half of it's gone in like two seconds.

"Slow the chiz down," André lectures. I swear he thinks he's my father sometimes.

Then I choke on a dry patch of beans.

Jammit.

"See?" André pats my back, not bothering to hide the smug "I told you so" look on his face. He loves it when he's right.

I stick my tongue out at him. I don't want to talk to him anymore. So, I turn to the others at our table. Robbie and Cat are_ kinda _arguing. Well, Cat's arguing with Rex, but Rex is Robbie's dummy. So…yeah. Beck's here too, but me and him aren't really that close. He's more like André and Robbie's friend. So that leaves Riley, Amber and Melissa.

"Hey," I say, getting their attention. When they turn to me, I continue. "Did you guys already sign up for the extra credit thing?"

"I went last year, I'll never go again." Melissa says, flipping her long red hair. A little bit of it lands in Riley's food.

I think she's going to kill her.

"What is it?" I ask before Riley can start yelling obscenities at her. Those two fight over _everything_, but they're really close when it counts. It's so weird. "Why wouldn't you ever go again?"

"Didn't you sign up for it?" Riley asks with a slight frown.

"Yeah?"

"And you don't know what it is?" Melissa double teams me.

"….No."

"It's camping," Riley offers.

"And homework," Melissa adds on.

"At the same time." They finish together.

I shrug. "That doesn't sound too bad." I've been camping a couple of times, and homework…well, it's an extra credit thing for school. I expected there to be a little work involved.

"It's bad," Amber cuts in.

"What's bad?" Ryder Daniels, Amber's boyfriend, appears at our table. "Not this, right?" he asks before kissing her. He's very sweet to her.

"No, that's not bad." She smiles back.

"Well, come with me and I'll get you some more."

Amber doesn't need to be told twice. "Later guys." She says, and then she's leaving with her boyfriend.

"I hate that guy," Riley says before they're fully out of earshot. I guess she doesn't care if they hear her. She doesn't exactly keep the fact that she hates Ryder a secret.

"Why don't you like him?" I ask.

She doesn't hesitate to answer. "He's cheating on her."

"How do you know?"

"He's got to be. I know she's not giving it up and he's not acting like he's not getting any.

I roll my eyes.

Melissa rolls her eyes too. "You're just jealous."

"Of what?"

"Of the fact that your twin has a boyfriend and you don't."

"You don't think I can get a boyfriend?"

"I'll be your boyfriend," Beck smiles at her. He's joking, but not joking, at the same time. He's already asked her out twice, but she turned him down. She says it's because he's in love with her sister, Ms. West, and she's not going to play substitute.

I can see what she means. Beck does seem to have a huge crush on our teacher. He stares at her a lot, and he's always trying to get alone time with her, like asking if she can help him with his work, or offering to help her with hers.

I wonder if Ms. West knows, 'cause she sure doesn't act like it.

"Tori?"

I freeze a little. I was just thinking about her and I could've sworn…I turn around and Ms. West is standing behind me.

I smile. "Yes, Ms. West?"

She doesn't say anything at first. Just looks at the right side of my chest. I look down to see what's wrong.

It's my hair…In the same braid that she put it in yesterday. I forgot to take it out.

I look back up at her. She's not scowling at me, so I relax. In fact, I think I see her lip twitch a little, like she wants to smile, but is forcing herself not to.

"Come with me, please." She commands. Then she's walking away super fast.

"You're in deep chiz," André whispers behind me.

I stick my tongue out at him.

Everyone else is murmuring the same thing though. Except for Beck. He's watching Ms. West's butt. And he's gnawing on his bottom lip. It makes me feel a little bit sick in my stomach.

I rush after my teacher, but I'm careful not to walk into her. I don't think she'd like that. She might yell at me again.

I follow her all the way to her classroom, just so she can sit me down and tell me that she's made me her TA.

"What?" I frown. I have no idea what the chiz that is.

"My teacher's assistant, Tori," she answers impatiently.

"Okay." I agree easily. It doesn't sound too hard.

Until she starts laying down all the rules. "The dance is your baby." She starts off. "You're to plan it on your own, or get some of your friends to help you. I honestly don't care how you do it. The only think_ I_ will do is chaperone, understood?"

I nod my head.

"Good, And as my TA, you'll have to stay after school with me at least twice a week to assist me with any extracurricular activities I may need your help with concerning my duties as head of student activities, starting today." She raises an eyebrow at me, asking me if I understand this as well.

I do, but I don't think I can do it. I don't want to.

I bite my lip. "Um, how long will that take?"

"A couple hours."

"I can't."

"It's nonnegotiable."

My heart sinks. "Ms. West"-

"Nonnegotiable." She repeats.

I snap my mouth shut. "Okay." I nearly cry, but I hold it in.

"You can go back to lunch now, Tori." She says curtly.

The bell rings. Lunch is over.

Not that I'm still hungry anyway.

I turn around and attempt to walk out of the classroom, but she calls my name when I'm at the door.

I turn back around to face her. "Yes, Ms. West?"

She beckons me to her with her index.

I hate that. I'm tempted to leave, head for fifth period, but I could never disobey a teacher. Especially not my favorite one.

I walk up to her, careful to leave enough space so that if I fall or something, I'll still be far enough away not to touch her.

She tilts her head a little and stares at me. For a long time. And I can't even look away. The way she's looking at me…It's like she's looking for all of my secrets, so I try my best to hide them.

"You needed something else, Ms. West?" I ask. I even smile at her; even though she's making me so nervous right now. Even though my palms are starting to sweat, and my heart is doing cartwheels in my chest.

She continues to stare at me. She's not that much taller than me, but that stare is making me feel so much smaller than her.

I look down at my shoes. I can't hold her gaze.

Not until she reaches out and fingers the end of my braid. My eyes shoot right back up to meet hers.

"Are you okay, Tori?"

I nod my head and grin at her. "I'm fine."

"You sure?" She gives it a gentle tug.

I nod my head again.

"Alright, go to class."

"Okay." I smile. And she gives me that look again. Like she wants to smile, but won't let herself.

I'm gonna make her smile one day. It's just become my own personal mission.

If my day was going by slow this morning, it practically goes _backwards_ after lunch. Ugh! I just wanna hurry up and get to Ms. Wests class. I wanna see her again. I want to see if she'll be nice to me again. Even if it's just for a few seconds.

And then finally, _finally_, I'm here, sitting in the front row. Beck sits in the front row too, and he's always on time for this class. Today, he was early.

And he's still mad. I told my friends that Ms. West is making me be her TA. Beck got a little pouty after that. It's more than obvious he wants to be her TA. But she chose me.

He shouldn't be jealous or upset with me. It's not like I'm her TA because I'm special. She's punishing me for going over her head and making her give me the Sadie Hawkins Dance. I'm not stupid.

But it could've been worse. She could've taken it out on my grades, or she could've been even meaner to me than usual, but she's not doing any of that, so I'm okay with her decision. I just wish I didn't have to stay so late.

Today's lesson is mostly a review on the five plot points, or key elements, when writing a script.

Ms. West turns to the board and starts writing down notes for us to take.

Beck's staring at Ms. West's butt again. I want to warn her, but really, what can she do about it? She's a very pretty woman, but she doesn't dress like it. She's very conservative, none of her clothes are ever form revealing. And even wears her hair in a very neat bun at the top of her head every day.

The only time I ever see her wear her hair down is when she goes for a jog around the lake across the street. But that's only on the weekends. That's when I see her in regular clothes too. Jogging clothes. She's got a very womanly shape, lots of curves and soft spots.

"Tori!"

I jump in my seat. Ms. West is standing right in front of me.

Oh no. Did she call on me while I was spaced out or something?

"Am I boring you?"

"No, ma'am." I shake my head.

She glares at me, arms crossed over her chest. I hear everyone take a deep breath, collectively. That's how much trouble I'm in. My face starts to burn. I bet it looks like a tomato.

"I'd tell you to see me after class, but that's a little redundant, isn't it?" She says.

"Yes, ma'am." I nod my head.

She goes back to the board. Back to teaching and I finally breathe. I didn't even know I _wasn't _breathing.

The bell takes forever to ring after that, but it's not like I can get up and go home like everyone else. I have to stay here.

Beck lingers for a bit, but he has to go eventually.

Ms. West tells me I have to write down my plans for the dance, then bring it up to her when I'm done.

I finish in two minutes.

She makes me do it over again because I left out a lot of important things; like the music, ticket pricing, decorations, fundraising, and a whole lot of other chiz. I didn't know it was gonna be _this_ much work. And I kinda feel bad for trying to pressure Ms. West into doing it. I'm sure she's busy enough without me adding to her workload.

I sneak a peek at her from time to time. She doesn't pay much attention to me, just sits at her desk and works on grading papers and stuff, I guess.

She's so pretty.

She catches me looking at her once. I hurry up and look back down at my notes before she can get creeped out by me.

"Tori," Crap. "Come here." She beckons, using her index again.

I really hate that. But I go to her.

"Are you okay?"

I frown. "Why do you keep asking me that?"

"Because you look like you're not okay." She deadpans.

"I'm fine."

""You're lying.'

"I _am_ fine." I fidget a little.

I'm soooo lying.

She stands up, making me feel small again.

"Do you need a ride home?"

"No, ma'am."

"Are you afraid of me?"

"No, ma'am."

"Good." Then she winks and leaves.

I don't even know what just happened. But I don't have a lot of time to ponder on it either. I gotta go.

I gather up my stuff quickly and run as fast as I can to the nearest bus stop. I notice immediately that it's starting to get dark outside already. I hope I don't miss the bus; then I'll have to wait an hour for the next one.

Luck is on my side because I make it just in time.

Usually I enjoy city bus rides. They're unnecessarily long, but hey, I always have time to finish my homework, or just people watch; but today I'm a bit antsy. I don't like riding the bus at night.

I don't like going to the hospital at night. It's too… empty.

I get to there about an hour later.

Nurse Deidra reminds me that I only have a few hours of visiting time left. I thank her and give her a smile before going into Trina and Mami's room. They share it.

I go to Trina first. She's only older than me by one year, but her boobs are way bigger than mine. I always tease her about that. If she were awake, she'd tease me back. I know it. But she hasn't woken up in years.

I kiss her cheek. If she were awake, she probably wouldn't like that, but I do it every day anyway.

I go to Mami next. She's the same as Trina. Asleep.

I lay down next to her and tell her about my day. I tell her everything. If she was awake, I think she'd find all my stories a bit silly, but I hope she'd like to hear them anyway. Just because _I'm_ telling them.

Dr. Brown comes in some time later. And I freeze, realizing just how late it is. I was supposed to leave before he got here. I always try to leave before he gets here. But sometimes he gets here early, or on his day off, just to see me.

"Tori." He smiles at me. "What a nice surprise."

He beckons me with his index.

I hate that.

I sigh and go in the bathroom with him. He shuts the door, and I pull down my pants. I hear him pull down his too, and that's when I start counting. One, Two, three, four…..I make it to 368 today. Not too bad. Not as bad as the day I made it all the way up to 929, at least.


End file.
